The coming week...

Wow, I feel like things are moving so fast and yet at the same time they are moving so slow.

It is the end of October...It's hard to believe that it was only 21 days ago today that I put my application in to join the CF...On Tuesday I have my medical and my interview...that's 25 days, I thought that maybe it would take me 2 or 3 months to get to this point.

Now 21 days later here I am anxiously awaiting Tuesday, wondering if I am prepared enough for the interview, if i have all my information that I need for my medical, and wondering how long the medical will take to come back, I've heard anywhere between 3 and 5 weeks. That will put me on the merit list somewhere between November 17th and December 1st!!

If it doesn't come back until December 1st, that means I wont go out to basic until early next year... if it comes back on the 17th I could be leaving as early as December 3rd.... its crazy to know that my life is now being controlled by someone else.... it will be nice to not leave until after Christmas though, it means that the time that I am in the field will be a little warmer...muddy, but warmer. However it means that its a few more weeks waiting. waiting to start my new career.

Its a scary thought, starting an entirely new career, it feels like I am doing this so late in life, that if I had only done things for me sooner I would be entrenched in the life and I may have followed a different path, not had to deal with some of the heartache...but then I think about the friends I've made, the people I've met and the lessons I have learned along the way, and I don't think that I would want that changed...I mean how many times do you make such good friends through the Internet that they would fly out to visit you for a weekend.... without you even asking them to. I know I have made friends for life, and I guess most of the nerves I am feeling is because of the fact that I have such an amazing support group...people that have been by my side and supporting me for years and people that feel like they have been by my side supporting me for years.

Through one of these people, I am beginning to find part of me that I have neglected for a long time... I am beginning to find my faith again. It is an amazing feeling, because having my faith come back makes me feel like I can do anything. It is just another thing for me to hang onto when I am away and missing everyone that has so impacted my life. I will hang on to the fact that not only do they believe in me but also in the fact that "through Christ I can do anything"

Mantra for the week of October 25, 2009
- Fear: You either face it or run from it - but if you run from it you chance missing something amazing.

- Stiletto